What to Do When You've Hit a Wall

(I was catching up with a dear friend yesterday and her current situation as a leader inspired today’s letter. I hope you all find these insights helpful!)

Dear friends,

We live in a world that is constantly pushing us to be productive and move forward every single day.

But sometimes we hit a wall and don’t know how to move forward. For example, we encounter a problem that we don’t know how to solve, or we face a challenge that we don’t know how to overcome, or our creative ideas seem to have run out.

This can happen to any of us. But for those in leadership positions, this uncomfortable state is commonly made more difficult by the weight of responsibility and the extra pressure to know the answers, respond quickly, and pave the way for everyone else.

In these situations, we may feel defeated and frustrated for being stuck. Fear and insecurity can also take hold of us and we can resort to forcing, gritting, and grinding, which will likely be counterproductive. We may end up going around in circles or hitting even more walls while draining our energy.

Instead, this may be a time for slowing down, finding stillness, and receiving even more self-compassion and gentleness.

Like everyone else, you are allowed to learn and grow. It is okay to hit a wall. It is okay to not have the answers. It is okay to run out of ideas.

I know this is an uncomfortable space to be in, but it helps to remember that it is not permanent - nothing in life is. Our capacity to breathe through the discomfort of not knowing, practice self-compassion, and allow ourselves to be still will make all the difference in how we move forward.

In the space of stillness (even if it is just for a few minutes), you can pause and recognize that you have met an edge. You can get curious and appreciate that you are on the cusp of further learning and growth. And you can quiet your mind and listen deeply to your inner guidance to move forward with intention and alignment.

This may also be an opportunity to ask for additional support and a fresh perspective from an advisor or mentor and/or from your team. If you’ve built a psychologically safe culture that values learning and growth, then this is a great time to model authentic vulnerability and true leadership.

For example, you can share with your team that you are not exactly sure how to proceed at the moment, but you are excited about how you will all grow together from this experience. If you believe it will be helpful, you can then come together with your team to think through and brainstorm possible solutions and next steps. 

Being a leader isn’t about having all the answers, it is about having the courage to pave the way for continued learning and growth, including your own.

Ultimately, this “wall” you’ve encountered is not just here to make your life difficult. It is here to guide you and perhaps redirect you to greater clarity and further expansion, flow, ease, and success. It may also invite you to identify and clear out internal and external blocks and make space for new possibilities. 

So I hope the next time you hit a wall and meet an edge, you remember to pause, breathe, be kind to yourself, ask for support, and allow your authentic curiosity, creativity, and leadership to flow through you.

With love and gratitude,

Maliheh